It's High Time Automakers Brought Back Egregiously Fake Wood Trim

For the most part, new car interiors are a lot nicer than they were 20 years ago, but there’s a certain something missing from them that bothers me: aggressively fake wood veneer. There was a time when just about every car (especially those from American companies) had some sort of wood-ish material inlay on the dashboard, and in my opinion, it’s time for that style to come back.

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I had that epiphany when I was borrowing my grandmother’s minivan to move apartments earlier this week. Her 2004 Chrysler Town & Country’s iconic tombstone-shaped dashboard is flanked by two of the most egregiously fake pieces of wood-ish plastic you’ve ever seen, and it’s lovely. It adds a certain touch of class that most cars are missing nowadays.

Let’s face it, if this car was being built now, that veneer would be one of two things. It would either be carbon fiber for some reason, or it would be piano black plastic. If you ask me, the veneer is just better in every single way. It adds a certain bit of class, a certain je ne sais quoi to an otherwise sort of bland interior.

I know not everyone will agree with me on this, as it’s sort of stupid. I mean, objectively wood veneer is kind of dumb and ugly, I like it a whole lot. Maybe it’s an American thing. You don’t see many European or Asian cars with fake wood like this. Most of theirs is real, and while that may be better in theory – it’s nowhere near as fun if you ask me.

As it turns out, I’m not actually alone in this. A few days ago, I committed the cardinal sin of tweeting out one of my blogs – posting about how I long for fake wood to return to car interiors, and it got a really warm reception. Over 400 people agreed with what I said, and a whole bunch posted their favorite examples of it. It’s nice to know I’m not alone on the island of bizarre car preferences.

So, this is a call to action for all automakers: bring back egregiously fake wood. About 400 people on the internet will be really glad you did, and everyone else can kick rocks. And, when I say fake, I mean fake. I don’t want to see any of this “open pore wood” crap. Give me a piece of plastic with a picture of wood on it, or give me death.